It's hard enough buying swim wear for holidays, but swimwear for proper swimming is a whole new story. Apparently in my first 6 months of swimming I was wearing the wrong one because it was too big (they should be tight enough that you should be able to run in your swimsuits girls), in search of a wetsuit the assistant persuaded me to buy a 'smaller than normal' speedo endurance, and it was frankly perfect.
So, imagine my excitement when I ordered a new speedo, titled LZR Pro, with special water repellant attributes, nice and tight, so tight, it prevented a deep breath and not sure whether I would have stayed fully in it (if you get my jist), so, with faith I ordered 2 sizes larger, and it fitted ok ish...
Picture the scene.
Hot shower before getting in the pool (amazing how few people do), slightly odd feeling of water gathering around my nether regions, distracted by water sitting on the surface of the costume in droplets and marvelling at the 'repellent' fabric. Too many splashy men in the deep end so I get in the shallow end to swim with the 'ladies what lunch'.
Enter the pool, feeling smug about how my new suit will give me the 'edge'. Then the dawning realisation that the suit has two layers, and in between them is filling up with water. As I swim, it literally wafts from side to side, like a fat suit, rippling around me and making me anything but streamlined in the pool. I stop at the end and stand up, watching the water gather in a pregnancy shape of around 6 months in my stomach, it requires me to press it to release the water.
I was so much in the mood to try for another full hour swim :( In the end I manage 40ish lengths realising the reason I need to keep hooking my suit out of my bottom cheeks is because of the weight of the water at the front. In the end in exasperation I give up, haul myself out, and realise that the water has then created a full nappy (diaper for the canadians reading this) appearance for all to see.
Sigh. Swimming is already sooo unattractive, mascara problems no matter how much you remove, red marks from the goggles that last 2+ hours afterwards and definitely are impacting my eye bags, the stink of chlorine that never seems to go, the dryness of my skin, the discolouring of my hair, and a pink stretchy hat, its somehow more manageable with a suit that fits.
Now for the reality check... In truth this is all tiny in comparison the challenges faced by the people we will be honouring when we swim the channel, those who survived cancer, and those who fought bravely through it and didn't. They wouldn't care a jot about a swimsuit malfunction, so in the interest of perspective, I giggled with my mum, my kids and my husband about the nappy and fat suit look, and bless my life that this is as hard as it gets.
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